The other day, I was having a rough time. 2 nights earlier, I started to have my hallucination visitors again and that, in addition to disturbing my sleep, it also escorts a butt-load of anxiousness.
Later that morning, Maureen found me in my chair uncontrollably crying. From what I can remember, I just kept saying, “I HATE THIS SH*T, I HATE THIS SH*T. HOW MUCH MORE CAN I TAKE?” She consoled me with hugs and positive words.
She then went into her office and came back with something in her hand. It was a little sign that read . . .
“YOU NEVER KNOW HOW STRONG YOU ARE UNTIL BEING STRONG IS THE ONLY CHOICE YOU HAVE.“
She put it on the corner of the TV table where I would see it morning, noon and night. (She’s crafty like that.)
Well, it worked. Even right now as I write this post, when I can’t think of the right word or the word I want to use but forget how to spell it, or how to use the settings on my laptop. (I must admit, I took a photo of the sign to use in this post but I couldn’t remember how to add it.)
I may have told you this before so if I did, please forgive me for repeating myself. Living With a Dementia-Related Illness that has no cure, no way to stop progression and just takes little pieces of your brain and just throws it away, REALLY SUCKS!
However, what I have come to realize is MY strength. It’s not a physical strength, it’s a strength that comes from within, a strength that before now I hadn’t fully realized.
I can now fully understand how strong my Mother was when she went through her Alzheimer’s Journey. Even when she lost her ability to speak, she tried her damnedest to get her message across by humming music or using her eyes and her smile. She was a very strong woman all her life and she never stopped being strong for, as the sign says, “Being Strong” for it was the ONLY choice she had.
Who knew a little sign could have such a huge impact?
Well, I do!
Until Next Time . . .