a-charlie-brown-christmasIf you’re a Baby Boomer like myself, you will probably recognize the photos from “A Charlie Brown Christmas.” For me, it brings back memories of happy, simpler times. That’s where Charlie Brown lived … in the simple times. Nothing really stopped him from doing the things he wanted to do no matter what others thought. He saw the beauty in things others didn’t. He was hopeful and did things in his own time. He was trusting … sometimes, too trusting.

Charlie Brown was just a simple guy who always saw the good in people, never judging, never holding a grudge. He’s described as, “Good ol’ Charlie Brown” is the lovable loser in the zig-zag t-shirt—the kid who never gives up (even though he almost never wins). He manages the world’s worst baseball team…yet shows up for every game. He can’t muster the courage to talk to the Little Red-Haired girl…yet keeps hoping. Even though he gets grief from his friends, his kite-eating tree, even his own dog, Charlie Brown remains the stalwart hero.”
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He is forever hopeful that Lucy won’t move the football. I think most of us wishes it will happen one day, so we cheer him on that he will, get to kick the ball at least once . . . but not this time. Lucy does what she ALWAYS does. She moves the ball away and Charlie Brown lands flat on his back.

We weren’t really surprised were we?
Charlie Brown was! As I said before, he always sees the good in people and he trusts they will not do anything to cause him harm. He trusts Lucy time after time. Why? Because that’s who he is.

(Just so you know, this post is not about Charlie Brown, but, you’ll understand in a little bit.)

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Lastly, there’s the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree that, in his mind, was the perfect tree. Of course, no one else but Charlie Brown saw the beauty of the simple little tree, and, as usual, they all laughed and made fun of the tree as well as him, “The Blockhead”, and hurt his feelings . . . AGAIN!

Maybe it was the Christmas Season that got to them, for this time, they saw just how much they had hurt Charlie Brown. 

Image result for charlie brown christmas treeWhen they saw the saddened little boy walk away as if he didn’t have a friend in the world, Linus anchored the little tree with his blanket and all Charlie Brown’s friends took the lights and decorations off Snoopy’s house and placed them on the tree. They brought Charlie Brown back to show him what they had done and he smiled so big. As with every Charlie Brown cartoon, he was accepted, everyone was smiling and singing and for a brief moment, everything was right with the world.

Now as a I said earlier, this is not about Charlie Brown and his friends. This is actually about reality in “Dementia World.”

Those of us who are living with a Dementia-Related illness sometimes feel like Charlie Brown. We have those days when we feel forgotten, dismissed, or if we don’t really matter. We sometimes come across people who we believe are our friends but turn out to be a “so-called friend” who pretend to have our best interest at heart, when all they are interested in is furthering themselves by using us to get there.

The feelings of abandonment and distrust we experience are not just about our friends but also about some  members of our family who no longer talk to us for whatever reason. We try our hardest to remember what we may have done to put this distance between us for we are certain (like Charlie Brown) it must’ve been something we did. When we come to the realization that it wasn’t us, it doesn’t feel any better.

When we are having a good day, we feel there is nothing we can’t do, so we take advantage of those days. We use our clarity to do something our minds would not allow us to do the day before, that is, if we remember the day before. Sometimes we do remember and we rejoice for the small victories. Sometimes we don’t and it’s OK because we know we’re not going to remember everything so we carry on the best we can.

Then there are the really tough days, the days when we go to kick the ball, and the ball is snatched away. On those days, we may literally fall on our backs, on our butts, hurting ourselves figuratively and mentally.  

If you’re thinking my point here is to make you feel sorry for me or for the millions of others who, like me, are living with Alzheimer’s or other Dementia- Related Illnesses you would be incorrect. Like Charlie Brown, we don’t give up . . . we CAN’T give up. Giving up is not an option. Giving up is an end and I can’t speak for everyone but I can speak for myself, I still have too much to do and I’M NOT READY TO GIVE UP!

What we do want are your friendships. We want your love. We want your understanding. This Disease is not something we asked for, this is not something we brought on ourselves, this is something that just happened to us and we are trying to make the best of the situation. 

Since this ’tis the Season, I ask you that if you know someone who is Living with a Dementia-Related Illness or any type of illness for that matter, please:

  • don’t assume we are receiving phone calls, letters, e-mails, Christmas Cards, etc. for you would probably be mistaken.
  • don’t assume we are being visited by friends and /or family for we may not be
  • don’t assume a gift card or other monetary gifts would not be appreciated
  • don’t assume anything about anyone, for you don’t know the whole story
  • the one thing you CAN assume is, “WE ARE STILL LIVING . . . WE ARE NOT GIVING UP . . . WE STILL MATTER . . . WE ARE STILL HERE!

I would like to take this opportunity to wish YOU, yes YOU, a Very Merry Christmas!

Until Next Time . . . 
PEACE (on Earth and good will towards men)

B

What Happened to our Society?

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As a Baby Boomer, (born in 1960) I grew up respecting my elders. Elders were basically anyone of the adult age. This meant Teachers, Bus Drivers, Law Enforcement Officers, Mail Carriers, Firefighters, anyone and everyone who was an adult. It didn’t matter who the person was, YOU RESPECTED THEM. If you didn’t, well, word would get back to your parents and they would “gently remind you” about the respect issue.

Fast Forward to today. What happened to RESPECT? You would be hard pressed to find a young child or a teenager addressing an adult as “Sir or Ma’am.” Instead you get “YEAH” or “NO” or nothing because they are texting or taking a Selfie and are too busy to answer. Somewhere along the line, RESPECT flew out the window.

Maybe I’m just old. At 58 years old, I don’t really feel old but in the eyes of a teenager or toddler, I’m ancient. My hair and beard is gray/white, my walk has slowed a bit, I have to rest a bit more than what I used to, so I can see where it may appear I am old, but unless I am spoken to rather than just judged on my appearance, how will anyone know who I am and what I can share.

I’m writing this because there is a huge issue in our society right now regarding ageism.
Ageism is described as : stereotyping of and discrimination against individuals or groups on the basis of their age. This may be casual or systematic. The term was coined in 1969 by Robert Neil Butler to describe discrimination against seniors, and patterned on sexism and racism.

Today, the term is often applied to any type of age-based discrimination, whether it involves prejudice against children, teenagers, adults, or senior citizens.
Throw in Alzheimer’s Disease and other Dementia-Related Illnesses and that just deepens the issue.

Although the term was coined in 1969, I haven’t really noticed the trend until recently. I started wondering, is it because I am growing older (almost 60)  or is it because I have Alzheimer’s Disease? Is it a combination of both?

I read an article this morning by my friend and Pioneer Network President & CEO Penny Cook, entitled, A New Culture of Aging — Making it HappenIn her article she states, “The first step of changing perception is creating awareness.” Creating awareness is something I know  a lot about.

I see and hear, on a daily basis, how those of us who are living with a Dementia-Related Illness are treated. As much as we would like, we are not treated as we were before our diagnosis.
Our diagnosis becomes a label.
That label carries with it, Stigmatization.
Stigmatization carries negative connotations.

I REFUSE TO BE LABELED!!!

So, I use my Alzheimer’s: Up Close presentation to educate and share awareness. It showcases that just because we reach a certain age or just because we have some sort of “cognitive difficulty” doesn’t mean we don’t matter. On the contrary. We probably matter more NOW than what we ever did.

The reason being, we can talk about:

  • what we want/need instead of assuming you already know
  • seeing us and not our disease
  • seeing us and not our age or appearance
  • connecting with us and not shoving us in a corner
  • DON’T pre-judge

There are always 2 sides . . . what we think and what you may think.
Those sides may differ slightly or dramatically but you would never know unless you ask. Responsibility as to what we can do and what we expect from others allow our voices to be heard.

In another article I read, written by Kendra Cherry for “verywell Mind”  “How Does Ageism Impact More Than Just Older Adults?”  it states: “In one study published in a 2013 issue of The Gerontologist, researchers looked at how older people were represented in Facebook groups. They found 84 groups devoted to the topic of older adults, but most of these groups had been created by people in their 20s. Nearly 75 percent of the groups existed to criticize older people and nearly 40 percent advocated banning them from activities such as driving and shopping.”

This is disturbing that individuals, who know nothing about us, are passing judgement on us, making assumptions about us and criticizing us because we have reached a certain age. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, however, using those opinions with no knowledge as to who these individual are is ludicrous. It is also a classic example of Ageism.

I could probably go on forever, citing more examples, quoting more articles, but I think you get the picture.

I may not be able to end Ageism today, but I sure can (and will) continue to make some noise about it. I’m a firm believer that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, however,  I will continue sharing awareness and educating that NO ONE has the right to pass judgment on another based on race, nationality, sexuality, age, as well as other “ism’s.” If you want to know more, don’t opinionate, just ask. We’ll be happy to talk with you!

PEACE!
Brian LeBlanc
International Alzheimer’s Advocate
“I have Alzheimer’s, BUT . . . it DOESN’T have me!

Alzheimer’s . . . from the Daughter / Dad Perspective

In honor of World Alzheimer’s Month, my daughter and I were asked to write a few words as to what it’s like to be a Dad with Alzheimer’s and a Daughter of a Dad with Alzheimer’s. Being today is World Alzheimer’s Day, here are our words, our perspectives, our truths.
My hope is that this brings an awareness, some clarity and raw honesty of how Alzheimer’s not only affects the individual with the disease but the family as a whole.  I also hope this shows that Living with Alzheimer’s is still “LIVING”, still “FEELING LOVE”, still being “ALIVE INSIDE!”
B

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Daughter of Dad with Alzheimer’s, from HER Perspective

Being the daughter of a parent living with Alzheimer’s is challenging, unpredictable, and the best way to learn patience. There comes a point where you find yourself, a child, not only wanting to help your parent with the disease, but also being left with no other option but to help. Luckily it doesn’t happen all at once.

It starts with helping them retrace their steps to finding their keys that they put in the fridge, to watching them struggle for a few minutes to find their car in the parking lot, to wondering if they know where a store is five minutes away from home, and then ultimately them not being able to drive anymore at all and having their license taken away. It’s a slow and steady progression, but it still hurts me all the same.

Being the daughter of a parent with Alzheimer’s is having a front row seat to watching someone so close to you literally lose their mind. Nothing prepares you for that, and when the time comes you have to just accept it and take it with a grain of salt. Conversations are a little harder to have, dinners aren’t as cheerful as they once were and outings have become progressively more stressful. But at the end of the day despite all the challenges, the unpredictable circumstances, and my patience running a little too thin…I still love my step dad, and I know he still loves me. 

Dad, with Alzheimer’s, of Daughter from HIS perspective

Being a Dad to a daughter is special, like a gift. Throw in Alzheimer’s and it complicates the entire situation. Her helping to care for me while I live with Alzheimer’s was nowhere on my radar, but she just jumped in and never looked back.

At 22 years old, she has her own life and will not be here forever. My questions are, will I be around or aware to see her married, become a mother, to hold my first Grandchild? Will I be there to celebrate those moments with her?

I know she tires of me asking questions she has answered before but she doesn’t bat an eye. She just answers. When she comes home at the end of her work day/night, she sits with me for a few moments, asking me questions about my day that most of the time I can’t answer but somehow, she already knows the answers and helps me fill in the blanks. Funny thing is, I don’t always recognize when she does this . . . but she knows, and it breaks my heart.

I realize I must sound the same as my Mother did (she also had Alzheimer’s) when I asked her questions. I’m sure, as confused as I sound, she still treats me with the same love and kindness as I treated my Mother. I couldn’t ask for anything more loving than that.

She states, “being the daughter of a parent with Alzheimer’s is having a front row seat to watching someone so close to you literally lose their mind.” I don’t know anyone who would want that for any of their children. I know I didn’t and I also know my daughter doesn’t have to do what she does, day in and day out, but she does it.

My one hope is that she is far, far away when I am in need of the type of care I’ll need in the end. Until then, I try to cherish each kiss on the cheek, each moment, no matter how big, small or insignificant we share.​

#WAM2017  #WorldAlzheimersDay2017

Until next time . . .
PEACE!

B

 

I Miss Reading . . . and A LOT of other things!

A friend of mine recently asked me if I had ever read the book, “tuesdays with Morrie” by Mitch Albom. She said, “he allows himself 10 minutes a day to mourn the passing of the old him.  After that, he lives in the moment for the day.”

I thought about this and although I do “live in the moment”, I don’t take the 10 minutes a day to mourn the passing of the old me. To be honest, I probably take a little too much time to mourn. 

“Don’t cling to things because everything is impermanent.” 
 Mitch Albom, Tuesdays with Morrie

51AhqmiD-oL._SX344_BO1,204,203,200_For instance, I thought to myself, “I would love to read this book, but I wouldn’t be able to remember what I’ve read.” Don’t get me wrong, I “CAN” still read, I just don’t retain anything I have read. Then I started thinking of all the books I’ve read over the years and how much I enjoyed reading. Then I got sad. Instead of taking 10 minutes to mourn, I took a little more . . . OK, A LOT MORE!!!
I not only mourned not being able to retain what I’ve read, I mourned not being able to work anymore. Working not only gave me a purpose but it also provided me with an income, an income that helped me provide for my family. Now, through Social Security Disability Insurance, I receive approximately 3% of the salary I used to receive. I’m thankful for receiving that but sometimes, I only look at the glass half-full.

“I give myself a good cry if I need it, but then I concentrate on all good things still in my life.” 
 Mitch Albom, Tuesdays with Morrie

I also mourn the loss of my driving privileges. Due to my brain hemorrhage that was discovered back in February of this year, as well as the temporary loss of my ability to speak, my Doctor strongly urged that I discontinue driving. I knew what “strongly urged” meant and I knew that would be the last day I would ever drive. I mourned a lot over that . . . and still do, however, it wouldn’t compare to the amount of time I would mourn if I hurt someone in my vehicle or in another vehicle.

“This is part of what a family is about, not just love. It’s knowing that your family will be there watching out for you. Nothing else will give you that. Not money. Not fame. Not work.” 
 Mitch Albom, Tuesdays with Morrie

I mourn the loss of friends. When I told Shannon that I wanted to “talk about my Alzheimer’s” she turned to me and said, “just remember, once you put it out there, you can’t take it back.” She was right!
My thought was, talking is my strong suit. By talking about it, it would hopefully help others have a better understanding of Alzheimer’s Disease and how individuals like me can still live a pretty good life. Also, by talking about it would keep me engaged, keep my brain working.
What I didn’t know was how many people would stop speaking to/with me because they didn’t think I would be able to carry on a conversation with them. Also, as I wrote about in a previous blog post, there are those who feel I’ve been faking this whole thing.
I wish I didn’t mourn that as much as I do.
However, looking now at the glass half-full, I have met some pretty phenomenal people in the Dementia World. These individuals are some of the bravest, funniest, most intelligent people I have come to know.
I have also discovered my true mission in life and that is being an International Dementia Advocate. It gives me purpose, drive and passion to a level I have never experienced. 

“Devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.” 
 Mitch Albom, Tuesdays with Morrie

I mourn a lot of other things, too many to go into here, however, I’ve realized by writing this blog post, and although I didn’t read “tuesdays with Morrie” I read some of the quotes from the book (some of which I’ve listed here) and I made myself a note and stuck it on my desk so I will see it every day. I may have to put one on the bathroom mirror, one by my recliner, make it my opening screen on my phone . . . 

  10 min

Whatever it takes to remind me to keep the mourning at a minimum.

“Life is a series of pulls back and forth. You want to do one thing, but you are bound to do something else. Something hurts you, yet you know it shouldn’t. You take certain things for granted, even when you know you should never take anything for granted.” 
―  Mitch Albom, Tuesdays with Morrie

I’ve never tried to paint a rosy picture of what it’s like to live with Alzheimer’s. I wouldn’t be honest with myself or with you if I did that. Just know, I don’t do it for sympathy. I don’t want nor need anyone’s sympathy. All I want to do is to live the best life I can possibly live in the remaining years that I have, which I hope will be many.
Until then, I’m going to continue my Advocacy Journey, doing the best I can to share awareness and education as it relates to everything Alzheimer’s and other Dementia-Related Illnesses.

Oh yeah, and remember to mourn no more than 10 minutes a day!

Until next time . . .
PEACE

B

Still Riding that High

Still Riding that High

Have you ever gone somewhere or had an experience that stuck with you for days, weeks or months after? I describe that type of feeling as a high (not drug induced) or a euphoric feeling, like catching the perfect wave and you ride it all the way to the shore. THAT kind of feeling.

Well, I’ve been in my “euphoric state of mind” for the past week and it was all due to a conference I attended in Atlanta, GA. The “Dementia Conference and Technology Showcase” was put on by Dementia Action Alliance of which I am a member of the Advisory Board. (being I’m a member of the Board has nothing to do with the way I’m feeling) The conference theme was Re-Imagine Life with Dementia . . . Engage – Empower – Enable. To you, they may be just words but to me, they were so much more.

I’ve been to Dementia conferences in the past and they have been great, informative and educational, but the one ingredient that was missing was inclusion. For those of us Living with Dementia, we are often spoken to or spoken about, but not heard from. Other times, we are there for other people to say, “Oh look, there are the people with Dementia! It’s so nice to see them out and about!”  Kind of makes us feel like a side show at the circus. 

This conference was all about us. Hearing from US! Listening to US! Learning from US!

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We were not only included from the very opening of the conference, we were a big part of what the conference was all about, and then we closed out the conference. 

 

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We were on panels, we were part of break-out sessions. 
We were even part of an Improv event at the Buckhead Theatre with “30 Rock’s and voice-over actor ‘Jack McBrayer’.”

And the individuals we worked with, the Dementia Action Alliance and ALL the wonderful sponsors of the event . . . THEY GOT US! They Got “IT”!

I’ve given my “Alzheimer’s: Up Close and Personal” presentation to an audience in Washington, DC at the National Academy of Sciences. I’ve spoken at a conference, In Chicago, IL for a national Insurance company about what type of decisions to be made before the end of life. I’m honored to teach“Crisis Intervention Team Training” to Law Enforcement  Officers and First Responders. These types of instances are what I hold near and dear to my heart. 

Not to downplay anything I’ve done in the past, however, to not only attend but be a part of this conference was life changing. It wasn’t the participation as much as it was meeting others like me, others who I’ve been speaking to for years either through teleconferencing or video conferencing but have never met in person, people I have come to know and love, people who I call friends. THAT was the highlight.) 

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We weren’t gawked at or talked about. We were celebrated. We were spoken with. We were asked questions. We were INCLUDED in the conversation. WE MATTERED! Our Dementia-Related Illnesses were still there, but they were not what was seen.

WE WERE SEEN!   WE WERE HEARD!   WE WERE UNDERSTOOD!

I guess the best way to sum it up was something I tweeted a day after the conference ended. It simply stated:
“You know why #DAAcon17 was such a success? THEY GET IT!”
#dementiaawareness #dementia #livingwellwithdementia #dementialife 

THEY GOT IT! There was no other way to state it other than that. 

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And . . . somewhere along the way, we had some fun, just being ourselves, so much that a comment was made, “I’m having so much fun ‘I FORGOT I HAVE ALZHEIMER’S’!”
I may or may not have been the one to say that, but I forgot! 

Until next time . . .
PEACE!
B

 

Taking Care of Our Own

This post is a bit different from what I normally post. I don’t mean to offend anyone, I’m just passionate about what’s going in our Nation. 

For all the folks that want to open our borders to immigrants from other countries, immigrants who will be supported by us, I have a solution.
Open YOUR home to support these individuals as well as their families, and be responsible for all of their actions. Feed them, clothe them and take of their medical needs. That is what you want for them, right? 
Giving them an opportunity, right? Well, now you can. No, I’m not being negative or prejudice. I’m being real.

With that said . . .

Why not take care of our Veterans who need our care? You remember our Veterans? The ones who fought for our rights and freedoms? Our Veterans who, because of their service to our country make it possible for you to stomp on and burn our Nation’s flag? Our Veterans who have to wait because a non-US citizen “needs” medical treatment because they matter more?

Why not take care of our aging population, the ones who gave us life, the ones that took care of us first?

Why not take care of those of us who have a fatal disease and put those dollars into research, respite care and hospice care?

We need to take care of our own, before we begin to take care of others.

I’m sure you take care of your families first, making sure they have all their needs met. Why can’t we, as a nation, take care of each other first and then, and only then, look to taking care of others?

If you still insist on taking care of others first, let me know. I will gladly take donations to help fight Alzheimer’s Disease, the disease that assisted in taking the lives of many of my loved ones and will ultimately assist in taking my life. There are also other organizations that could also desperately use your help.

If you still insist on taking care of others, open your home to a Veteran, a member of the homeless population, or any other US Citizen that could use some help.

See what needs you can assist with in your own community. There are so many individuals right here in my community that are doing wonderful things for the betterment of the people that live here. They are awesome individuals who do these things, not to call attention to themselves, but because they are fulfilling a need for the individuals that live here.

Now, if you are STILL not satisfied, I’m sure there are many Middle Eastern Countries that will welcome you, as well as your support, with open arms and will even provide you with free housing. It may be cramped, dirty, hot and uncomfortable, but don’t worry, your visit will not last very long.

That is what you want, RIGHT?

Have a Great Day!

If You Can Reach At Least One . . .

Since becoming an Alzheimer’s Advocate, I have spoken to groups numbering 1 to 1,000. The locations have been auditoriums, small halls, retail stores, bars, and churches. Neither the number of people nor the location ever affects the way I share my Alzheimer’s story. I speak with the same passion, I speak from the heart, I speak from real life experience.

Shortly after my diagnosis in October 2014, I knew what I had to do. It was something I had been doing all my life . . . something I had done in my professional life. Since I no longer had a professional life, I knew sitting around watching TV all day was not going to do me any good.  I had to talk about it.

Alzheimer’s is a funny (not a ha-ha funny) disease, in that you never know what memories you will keep or forget.
One memory I have kept is of a wonderful Manager I had years ago. He was a retired Navy guy. I’ll call him, “Mike”. “Mike” was the BEST Manager I ever had for he pushed me. When he felt I wasn’t pushing myself hard enough, he called me a “Rack Lizard.” If I remember correctly, (and no, I’m not joking) a Rack Lizard was a Navy or military term used for someone who was a bit lazy, “laying around
 in their rack (bed) all day.) He used it not as an insult or not because I was lazy, but as a tool to push me to be better. 

It was in the early 2000’s, a very busy time in the Communications business for we were launching Digital Cable and High-Speed Internet.  We were knee deep in customer calls wanting information and technical support so we had to hire a large number of temporary employees to help with the overflow. I was the Technical Support Supervisor and I felt I was not giving my regular team members the proper attention. So I went to see “Mike”.

I told him I felt like I was not reaching all my employees and I didn’t want them feeling ignored or unappreciated. What he told me as a response to my concern was something that has lived with me to this day.
He said, “As much as you would like, you are not going to reach every single person. However, if you can reach at least 1 person and that 1 person succeeds because of your interaction, then you have done your job.”

It was awesome advice. From that point forward, I remembered what “Mike” said and it got me through some frustrating times. Although it was excellent advice, the flip side was you never really knew whose life you may have touched, who that 1 person is.
Well, I got see to see that 1 person.

I recently co-moderated a couple of focus groups. We spoke to 2 different groups and they were individuals with Dementia-Related Diseases as well as their Caregivers. The discussions ranged from how they (the person with the Disease as well as their Caregiver) are managing their lives to what they learned from their Physician when they were first diagnosed. 

The discussions were very interesting for I could relate to almost every person in the group. We may have had a different Dementia-Related Disease, but some of the symptoms are the same. The first group was a bit reserved at first but after they warmed up to us, they opened up. We felt it was a great success.

The second group was fewer in number but they opened up immediately. One particular person, I’ll call her “Sally”, was very anxious. She was there with her sister.“Sally” had not yet been diagnosed but was showing signs of someone with Early-Onset Alzheimer’s. (I am not a Doctor and my opinions are my own.) Her sister said she had become extremely forgetful and was getting wore.

From what her sister shared with us, “Sally” was consistently worrying about things she forgot about the day before. She was forgetting about the present day and was not remembering what was going going to happen tomorrow. Basically, she was worrying 24/7 and not really focusing on the here and now.

As I said previously, “Mike’s” advice had a huge impact on me, so much that I use it when I give my “Alzheimer’s: Up Close and Personal” presentation.
It comes in the latter part of the presentation . . . “As much as I would like to reach every single person in the world, I know that is not possible. However, if I can affect at least one person in a positive way, I am doing my job.”

I gave “Sally” some of my own advice that worked for me. I told her (and reminded her sister to help her remember) to let go of the things she forgot about the day before and not worry about tomorrow. The only thing she could do was to live in the here and now . . . LIVE IN THE MOMENT! She began to repeat the phrase over and over as if she was trying to burn it into her brain. Surprisingly, it calmed her, not completely but she was a lot better than what she was. Her sister told me she would help her to remember.

 Now, when I talk to folks, I don’t usually see them again, unless I go back to that same group. Being I was out-of-town, I knew I would probably never see these folks again. I would have to hope that my words helped them in some way . . . not everyone, but just one. 

The next day, I was going back to my hotel and I was hungry. I figured I would stop off at Publix and get both lunch and dinner so I could just eat in my room. I was at the deli counter when I heard someone saying, “excuse me sir . . . excuse me sir.” I turned and it was “Sally’s” sister. She said, “It IS you!” then proceeded to give me a great big hug.

She said, since they left the focus group, “Sally” was changed. She was a bit more relaxed and would say every now and then, “I’m going to live in the moment.” She thanked me for making a difference in “Sally’s” life by listening to her and giving her advice that truly made a difference and had a positive impact. I immediately thought of “Mike” and how finally, after all these years, I experienced “THE ONE!”

We spoke for a few more minutes and I left to go find my dinner. I admit, I was a bit teary-eyed after experiencing something I thought I would never experience. But my joyful moment was interrupted by another voice . I heard, “Mr. Brian . . . Mr. Brian, is that you?” Lo and behold, it was “Sally”. She was waiting for a prescription. She ran up to me and gave me a great big hug, saying, “Thank You, Thank You, Thank You! You changed my life!!!”

I may have, but I don’t remember ever hearing those words before. I just let her hug me and I hugged her back. She told me she had been “Living in the Moment” since the day before and she didn’t even worry about things she forgot. She said she slept the whole night through for the first time since she could remember. She couldn’t thank me enough and she would never forget me and would pray for me and my family as I lived with my Alzheimer’s.

What a WOW moment!!! It was an incredible feeling but also very humbling. Once I got back to  the car, tears flowed. I have given that advice to probably thousands of people and not once has it come back like this. It was a life-changing moment. Now that I have it in print, I will be less likely to forget this experience but if I do, I’ll remember when I re-read this.

I owe a debt of gratitude to “Mike” for sharing his knowledge, his experience and his words of wisdom with me, oh those many years ago.  “Mike” your words have served me well, sir and in case you haven’t experienced “the one”, well he’s writing this blog post!

Now, about that Rack Lizard term . . . .  🙂

PEACE,
B