Imagine my amazement when through recent conversations with some close acquaintances, I was told that there are individuals who think I am FAKING my Alzheimer’s Disease. Yeah, I know, right?

First off, HOW IN THE HELL DO YOU FAKE ALZHEIMER’S DISEASE???

• I’ve had brain scans. Did I manipulate them by turning my brain off, not thinking anything while in the scanner?
• I’ve been diagnosed, not once, not twice, not thrice, but 4 freakin’ times
  by a Neurologist, a Neuropsychiatrist, and two Neuropsychologists (appointed by the Social Security Administration, who by the way, declines benefits until no stone is unturned). Did I fake not remembering how to draw a clock or another type of shape?  Did I fake remembering the 4 words I was told 5 minutes ago?
• Do I fake every day not remembering things from 1 minute, 1 hour or 1 day ago
• I’ve had my driving privileges taken away by my Dr. for it was determined I no longer have the cognitive abilities or proper reaction time to operate a vehicle. Did I fake that too?

WOW . . . if I was faking all this, I must be a pretty damn good faker to have come up with this diabolical plan. But wait, if I was actually faking it, wouldn’t that take someone who can think and remember what to do, day in and day out, so they could remember to keep “faking it?”

Could someone:

• who has no clue what day it is
• who cannot tell time on a non-digital watch
• who has to have alerts on his phone to remind him to take his medicine, to eat and to bathe every day
• who can’t remember, day to day, how to work a TV remote

Could someone who is Cognitively Impaired really carry out this plan?

Oh wait, I get it . . . I’m supposed to be curled up in a bed, not able to talk intelligently, not able to feed myself or go to the bathroom by myself, and not remember my wife and children. God forbid, should I be able to use a laptop to write blog posts that will hopefully bring awareness and education to people who don’t understand the in’s and out’s of Living with Alzheimer’s Disease that they only saw in their elderly parents and grandparents.

GEEEEZZZZ, I guess since I’m able to do all of these things, maybe all of those so called medical professionals, all 4 of them, plus their PA’s and NP’s, all with their Diplomas and Certificates and published articles are just full of shit!

Maybe they have a quota as to how many people they have to diagnose with a Dementia-Related Illness each month and they needed just one more to be awarded the monthly “Hey, You Diagnosed Some Poor Sucker with a Fatal Illness Who Wasn’t  Really Sick” award, and I was the lucky one.
Maybe they (all 4 Dr’s, PA’s and NP’s) deliberately lied to me just to turn my life and my family’s life inside out and upside down, all the while so they can collect a $35 co-pay so they have some spending money for lunch!
Wow, did they pull the wool over my eyes, or what?

I’ve been open and honest about my Alzheimer’s life since the day I was diagnosed. When I talk about it, I don’t do it to make people feel sorry for me, to have pity on me or to call attention to myself.
If I did that, I’d be dishonoring the lives of my Grandfather, my Mother and Father, or my wife’s Grandmother.
If I did that, I’d be making a mockery of every person in the world who has Alzheimer’s Disease, whether they be over or under the age of 65, individuals who I now call a friend.
If I did that, I’d be purposely putting my wife and children through sheer, underserving, inexcusable, wretched hell.

Well, I don’t have the capability to do something like that. 

I’m not saying I’m perfect for I have many faults and I’ve made many mistakes in my life that I’ve paid dearly for, but I’m not evil!

So, for those of you who want to continue thinking I’m faking my illness, please go right ahead. You have the right to think and say what you want. You can’t hurt me anymore than what I’ve already been. We don’t talk or see each other so it’s not like I’m missing out on anything.

Since receiving my “diagnosis” I’ve become non-existent to you, well, except to be called a fake, not to my face of course.

So please, continue your path in life and feel good about yourself. It must be nice to sit upon your throne and pass judgment upon those of us, you feel, are just skating through life.

Yeah, I’m skating alright. Of course, I can no longer skate on my own (guess I’m faking that too) but I’ve got Shannon (and her family), Asheton, Bradley, Linda and so many others holding me up both physically and emotionally when I need it. Unfortunately, I’ve been needing their assistance more and more lately but they are always there. I know I’m fortunate to have them, and yes, I know who YOU are, and I NEVER take it for granted.

They understand what I go through every day. They see and talk to me on good days, bad days and all days in between, because they get it and I am so thankful for that.

Feel free to call them and ask them if I’m “faking it”.
Better yet, just call Shannon. She would just loooooove to talk to some of you.
Just be prepared though, she’s kinda protective of me.

Until Next Time . . .

PEACE,
B